Recently I have fallen victim to a tyrannical monster: self doubt.
In the past few weeks I have fallen from my divine place alongside vanity, pride, and the other warm and welcoming (little sarcasm here) vices. The journey to self doubt has shown some light on a few things. Frightening realizations about my ability to be a independent woman. Mostly, my fall has given me an unsettling sense of defeat. How could I possibly overcome this?
I needed to find courage to “bite the bullet” and admit my own deeply ingrained flaws.
I never claimed to be perfect. My flaws were always evident; but I usually tried so hard to hid them. Like I was trading parts of myself for something store-bought and new.
It’s quite upsetting how we hide what we really are; like we’re ashamed of what makes us unique.
I am almost certain I have ADD. I lack motivation and hardly have the willpower to complete the projects I begin (like this one…). The road to hell is paved with good intentions, I guess.
Anyway. Self-doubt has got me down, or at least HAD me down. I’ve undergone some very severe life changes in the past 6 months, and adjusting to them has made me the stronger.
But we will always have the little voice telling us “look who’s doing it better”, or “I’ll never be that great, anyway”. The most difficult part of life is to not listen. Don’t give in or let it consume you. If you do you might be stuck living the same day over and over again. Groundhog hell.
I will post more about my experiences and what I’m doing now to combat self doubt. But for now, I’ll leave this preview of what’s to come.
Until next time, folks.